Thursday, August 27, 2009

Apollo, Your Reign is Over: Sydney Fc Analysis

STAND up and be proud Central Coast and Sydney FC for last week serving up the largest pile of steaming faeces I have ever witnessed on a football field.

Everyone except for Clint Bolton, Danny Vukovic, John Hutchinson and Kofi Danning should be embarrassed with themselves. If this was Rugby League I would have chucked some of you into reserve grade and the rest would have played for the Newtown Jets under 20s.

What did us fans do to deserve this? What a tease job. For two weeks you gave both sets of supporters hope that this year would be different. Armed with K Rudd's stimulus money, we bought season tickets, a new replica kit and a hopeful attitude.

With Spiderbait's tune Shazam as the soundtrack to Season Five playing in our ears the game in Gosford was supposed to be an epic contest.

Stephen Keller, what are you doing? I never thought I'd say this to a Swiss person but chill, dude. I counted nine glory balls in the first half hour. This doesn't look like European football to me. If it was a coach's instruction to go long at every moment, why would you listen to the coach? Haven't you got your own ideas?

To watch the clever editing of the highlights on Fox Sports you would think it was an entertaining game. But not for the first or last time, the television lied.

Take a lesson from Gold Coast. Their tactics are that they have no tactics. For once Mad Miron is right. But beware if Shane Smeltz and Jason Culina get injured - the White Shoe Brigade are farked. How long can they make Steve Fitzsimmons, Kristian Rees, Michael Thwaite and Steve Pantelidis look good?

In the meantime, Gold Coast United have turned the football world in Australia on its head.

Miron Blieberg is from the Dionysian school of coaching. Dionysus was the god of wine whose values were emotional, hedonistic, sensual, unrestrained and irrational.

Every other A League coach is from the Apollonian school of coaching. Apollo is the god of light and the sun and his values were form creating, representational, orderly, self-control and rational.

Don't ask me what Fury are doing the football gods themselves are puzzled.

When they say the type of manger a team has is reflected on the pitch you can see why.

Control and order on a football pitch is an illusion which is why the unrestrained and irrational play of the Gold Coast is so good to watch.

Gold Coast's play at times has been indescribably pleasurable. As football fans, it revives the Dionysian nature that is in all of us.

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