A League Season Seven Preview

So what are you looking forward to the most this lucky season seven of the A-League? Is it the Sydney VS Melbourne rivalry?  The Harry Kewell circus has arrived. Will it be goals, assist or groin injuries that take centre stage? If you are Branko Culina and Jason Culina you are probably chinking your glasses together and saying cheers to the payout!

So here is my preview of Season Seven featuring the teams and what I think will be the season biggest events.

Sydney FC

Can you name Sydney FC’s imports? I can’t and of course you can’t because you and I have never heard of them.  Is Russian Owner of Sydney FC David Traktovenko really worth 500 million? Does he sit around in Gentlemen clubs talking to his millionaire buddies about  Hirofumi Moriyasu  and Juho Makela?

Yes yes Brett Emerton is here and it’s great to see him back and I can’t wait to see the combination play the former Blackburn star and Nick Carle, Terry Antonis and Nick Petratos can muster up. But seriously Bruno Cazarine and Juno Makhela are not names that should strike fear or bring any familiarity to your casual football connoisseur.

Stama’s prediction. Carle and Emerton will shine or both will get injured and coach gets sacked. Zeljko Kalac and Steve Corica  then get put in charge and win the comp with late surge.

Newcastle Jets when Nepotism goes bad.

Well screw all the positive Hype about being the best season ever. The Newcastle Jets stole every A-League teams thunder by sacking the coach and their best player. Boo farken who. Branko gets a handsome payout and so does son Jason.  Nathan Tinkler showed his ruthless side. How very European football of you, sacking the coach and best player even before the first game!. Now show how European football you are and spend some of that mining cash you stingy Novocastrian.

Predictions: Well who the hell knows what will happen now?  WTF  time for the Jets. Jobe Wheelhouse as captain, Branko and Jason gone and where is Ljubo the lip in all of this?

Gold Coast United

Do we still have to endure the soon to be Fold Coast United and Miron Bleiberg speak for another season? Again the same question I ask to Mr Traktavenko of Sydney FC I ask to you Mr Clive Palmer of Coal Coast United. Are you really worth 3 billion? Palmer also has showed he has a ruthless side by signing and then sacking NSWPL star Mat Smith in one foul swoop.

Prediction. More boring talk about crowds and 2 2 2 2 2 formations galore

Wellington Phoenix: rising from the ashes and falling into receivership. almost

Every season Wellington Phoenix’s future is under attack.  If it’s not the Asian Football Confederation threatening their playing future or Terry Serepisos’s dodgy cash flow the Nix just can’t seem to settle.

Seripisos famously thought of the idea of the Phoenix while getting a haircut. I wonder what he was doing when he was told that he had to give up the club. Perfect Symmetry would say he was getting a haircut but life’s true Symmetry would suggest he was probably on the toilet checking his I Phone messages when he found out.


Prediction: No finals

Adelaide United- Ex Overseas Socceroo Club.

Space Dilveski, had it, lost it. So too did Dario Vidosic. Bruce Djite also had then it lost it. John McCain had it but didn’t lose much. What am I talking about? Their overseas football careers of course.  As a Sydney boy The Pissants squad is making me very jealous. The Reds probably have the most attacking squads along with Melbourne Heart and Melbourne Victory.

Prediction: First.

Brisbane Roar

Now Brisbane have also had it and somewhere down the line lost it after last season’s grand final win. But the IT I‘m talking about is their GF wining squad. Their best players have left. Is Brisbane such a bad place to live? Well I have been and the answer is yes yes it is.

Expect to see comparisons to Inter Milan because of the international flavour of their team. The team has imports from world football powerhouses of Bahrain and Canada. To replace Kostas  Barbarouses and Jean Carlos Solórzano. My first instinct is to ridicule but hey its Bahrain and Canada

Prediction: Second season syndrome is real.

Central Coast Mariners

Probably have the best youth in the league.  Mustafa Amini , Bernie Ibini Isei, Oliver Bozanic, are all exciting players to watch. Have taken a softly softly approach so I don’t have that much to ridicule.

Prediction: Finals

Perth Glory

Remember the NSL? That was fun wasn’t it Perth?

Prediction:  Ian Ferguson, sorry Perth.

Melbourne Heart

The derbies will be great but I just can’t warm to a team that has more Westpac employees as members than actual football fans.  David Williams and Fred alongside Jean Carlos Solórzano will be tough for most A-League defences.

Prediction: Finals

Melbourne Victory.

Melbourne Victory will have a great season and it pains me to say it. They have made the signing of the Universe with Harry Harry Kewell.  What are the odds a no name Kreas pops up (meathead in Greek) and ruins it for everyone.

Prediction: Yeah the Tards might win.

The big Seven in Season 7

1

     Harry Kewell vs. Australian Media

Take your pick. If it’s not Fairfax journo’s Michael Cockerill or Papou Lynch shitting and pissing on Harry’s parade be sure that Ray Gatt will be in there somewhere “reporting” on what a little C our Harry can be at times, As I have reported earlier its only Analysing or Cheerleading when it comes to our Harry.

2)    
      Harry Kewell VS Robbie Slater

For two men who struggle to speak at the best of times watching these two Socceroo legends thrash handbags at each other on Fox Sports was mesmerising. Seeing Robbie involved with the promo of Harry on Fox Sports just cracks me up. The hypocrisy must be eating him up. But he’s passed it. He’s a circus!!!  Shut up and read your lines Robbie!

3)    \

      Harry Kewell vs.  Harry Kewell’s groin

      Harry Kewell’s Groin watch was probably the biggest event at last year’s World Cup for most Australians. When Harry’s groin makes its debut popping noise at some point during  the A-League it will crush a nation just as it did when they saw Harry walking on crutches against Italy at the 2006 World Cup. C’mon Harry you can beat your groin!


      Harry Kewell vs. Graham Arnold’s poison

You just want to be a fly in the wall somewhere when Harry Kewell talks about Graham Arnold to his close mates and when Graham Arnold talks about Harry Kewell to his close mates. What they would say oh what they would say.


Harry Kewell vs. Football Federation Australia

One of the benefits of being an English colony is that English common law and  the adversarial system is part of our legal framework. There is no anarchy like the Greeks here. But there is a nanny state at play. Words like bureaucracy, red tape, policy and procedure, best practice and health and safety  are permeating into our daily lives. So when Harry wants to sign with Ford or with any sponsor he should tell the FFA to quietly F off. A quote I heard from Chris Tsiolkas Author of the slap that should be taken as warning to the FFA bean counters. Never spit on your fortune.

Harry Kewell vs. Harry Kewell at Leeds and Liverpool

The only competition you have is with yourself and your own potential. Harry will never ever be able to compete with the Harry Kewell at Leeds or the fit Harry Kewell at Liverpool. But Harry Kewell’s 45 minute cameo against Adelaide United showed everyone what a talent and special player he is.


Harry Kewell VS Brett Emerton

Oh yeah let us not forget the football. The battle between these two will ultimately be the highlight of all the match ups. It’s Sydney vs. Melbourne. The Convict Inspired Sydney Town with no care for any town planning or the Banker inspired Melbourne Town with its neatly planned grid pattern. Sure Harry is the biggest name and has the Hollywood looks but Brett is the nice guy a bloke you could have a beer with.

Being a Sydney boy hopefully the nice guy doesn’t finish last.

So what are your predictions and special moments going to be for you this Season Seven?