My Cove adventures @ the Sydney FC v Melbourne City game. Lesson 1 save your booing for the Western Sydney Wanderers not David Villa!
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Showing posts with label david villa. Show all posts
Showing posts with label david villa. Show all posts
Friday, October 17, 2014
Thursday, October 9, 2014
A-League Season 10 Preview
So the longest off season in any sport in any world is over. My sentiments exactly.... pretending to care about the other codes is done. Let the real football begin. Bring on Season 10 of the A League.
Here are some musings and rantings of what I expect from Season 10 of the A League.
O Marquee, Marquee wherefore art thou Marquee?
Alessandro Del Piero is in India drinking Mango Lassi and collecting Rupees, Emile Heskey is in England doing the pundit thing and Shinji Ono’s is in Japan’s second division the question is wherefore art thou A-League’s Marquees?
There will be pundits on TV and in print rolling out the line “The biggest Marquee in Season 10 of the A League is the number 10” or something like that. The A-League was spoilt the last two seasons with Alessandro Del Piero, Emile Heskey and Shinji Ono
The Top Marquee this A-League season is the number 10. Why would you want a washed up number 10 when their is the Tenth Season of the A-League to celebrate.
Judging by the memberships sales figures the lack of big name Marquees is not affecting the fan numbers. Nice work number 10! It’s taken you ten years but you’ve proved round numbers are very sexy.
David “who needs a pre season?” Villa
Word is David Villa with a hard soft L only arrived a week before the start of A League season because he wanted to see as many Enrique Iglesias concerts as he could. Check out Villa’s Instagram account it’s very true! http://instagram.com/p/tZEYTlPBfW/
Will the World Cup, Euro, La Liga, Champions League winner even bother to play the 10 guest games for Melbourne Heart (Excuse me I forgot it’s Melbourne City now isn’t it) before he heads over to New York to catch up with his superstar mate Frank Lampard?
Or will Villa with the hard soft L love Melbourne so much that he decides to stick around for the whole season?
Probably not. Melbourne City isn’t New York City.
Perhaps if Enrique Englesias does a 28 week tour of Melbourne he’d stay longer. Twenty thousand Euro snobs will be pissed off if he doesn’t play in the opening game of the season against Sydney FC?
Melbourne “Lipstick on a Pig” City
Continuing on with the Melbourne City theme without Damien Duff, Robert Koren and David Villa and a changed home strip and changed name this eerily still feels like Melbourne Heart. Sure it’s ok to change things around with new owners coming in but what will all those Melbourne Westpac workers do now? Only support Melbourne City when they play in their away strips?
Also Robert Koren as the marquee? The richest club in this dimension and the club have chosen a Slovenian Midfielder who used to play for Hull?
Sydney FC
Now that Alessandro Del Piero has left what will all those Euro Snobs do with their summers and their Sydney FC Del Piero named shirts?
I surely thought Sydney FC’s membership numbers would drop due to the Euro Snob factor but they’ve actually increased this season. At the Sydney FC fan day ex Central Coast Mariners coach Graham Arnold said that it was always his dream to coach his home town club of Sydney FC. Nicely said Mr Arnold the Mariners fans must love hearing that.
Are Sydney FC doing a Manchester United and lining up the attack with quality, but not bothering to improve the defence? With Alex Brosque, Shane Smeltz, Marc Janko, Corey Gamiero and Bernie Ibinie, Sydney FC probably have the best attack in the A League. It will be back four that that will be the Sky Blues problem this season.
Brisbane Roar
My new Albanian - Mensur Kurtishi is better than my old Albanian - Bersart Bereshia. That's what Brisbane Roar will be hoping.
The off season was so long I forget that the Roar are the current A-League champions. Is the reason I’m forgetting because of the A-League has world’s biggest offseason in sports? Or just the fact that because of the vast news and information going through our modern brains as each moment occurs we are simultaneously experiencing and forgetting them.
Western Sydney Wanderers
Can they repeat last two season’s success and lose the grand final three seasons in a row?
Can they lose the Asian Champions League Final in between and lose four finals in a row?
Everyone knows the real star of the team is The Red and Black Bloc. Perhaps they should try a new way of supporting their team. Perhaps they could try the reverse of turning your back on your team, and actively watch them from the front of their heads.
And what’s with the silent protesting and the I’m not coming to the game anymore because my mate lit a flare and they banned him for life protest!
Tony Popovic must be an autistic genius at the art of suffocating the opposition and the grinding out a result with Mark Bridge and Labinot Haliti and Brendan Santalab in attack. He could have been Crystal Palace Manager by now instructing Mile Jedinak to break legs and shave off that beard.
Beware Victor Saba your Ned Kelly is numbered!
The "Mutiny” on the Perth Glory
Last season “ The Mutiny” on the Perth Glory “ was led by their captain Jacob Burns, against Lieutenant Alister “Curriculum “ Edwards.
According to accounts, the players were not happy with the "idyllic" life and the opportunities that Lieutenant Edwards afforded to his two sons Cameron and Ryan.
It has also been argued that the Mutineers were motivated by Edwards’s allegedly harsh treatment of them when asked they were asked to play out from the back.
The Mutineers look foolish now as one of the sons Ryan Edwards had amde a decent impact at Reading since he set sail for the Royals in the English Championship.
Newcastle “for sale” Jets
When will the suited and booted folk at Football Federation Australia realise that having billionaires like Nathan “I want to buy the club, no sorry I want to sell the club” Tinkler who use A-League clubs as their playthings is not a good idea?
The Jets haven’t made the finals for years and this year will be just as tough as they have more injuries in their squad than the aftermath of a Friday Night out in Kings Cross and an NRL grand Final.
Adelaide “Mini Me Barcelona” United
So the coach of Adelaide United Josep Gombau was at FC Barcelona for seven years.
The Technical director of Adelaide United former Barca and Spanish International Gillermo Amor after his playing days was responsible for the youth categories at FC Barcelona for four years and most recently he was the director of football training while Messi, Iniesta and Xavi were there.
A slow start to the season led to Gombau being told to harden by a local journalist. The Reds could make a big impact this season they have best technical football knowledge. Will their 3-4-3 make an impact?
Central ”I’m moving to North Sydney maybe” Coast Mariners
One week they are staying on the Central Coast, the next they are moving to North Sydney, another week they can’t pay their players, another week they are opening a 10 million dollar Centre of Excellence, another week goes by and they announce a team of football scouts, the next week, they are being bought by South Melbourne.
It’s never dull up the Coast.
Wellington “does anyone care besides us Wellingtonians?” Phoenix
No Disrespect to the sheep botherers but I’d rather watch a team from Wollongong or Canberra.
Melbourne Victory
For the team that is the biggest club in World Football, it Feels like Melbourne Victory have flown under the radar during this pre-season. Usually the Central Coast Mariners fly under the radar. The Victory took the Bipolar Albanian Besta Berisha from Brisbane Roar so they should be challenging.
Will some Melbourne Victory fans rush to buy memberships because they have mistaken Allesandro Del Piero for Matthieu Delpierre ? Thinking that it’s a typo and the Blue Tongued Maestro is now playing for the Victory?
Who is Del Pierre anyway and what is the Victory's fascination with Marquee defenders Paulo Contreas ?
A League Before of Season Awards
Best Name that almost has a swear word in it: Devante Clut (Brisbane Roar)
Best use of alliteration in a name: Jimmy Jeggo (Melbourne Victory
Best misspelt marquee name: Matthieu Delpierre
Best if it worked with one Albanian let’s try another: Brisbane Roar
The Tom Rogic Groin Injury award: Tom Juric just like the RBB his groin is involved in a rather loud active protest.
The award for best use of useless A-League knowledge: being able to name the Wellington Phoenix squad besides Paul Ifill who doesn’t even play with them anymore. Just joking Phoenix........
Best Hipster Ned Kelly Beard: Victor Saba
Here are some musings and rantings of what I expect from Season 10 of the A League.
O Marquee, Marquee wherefore art thou Marquee?
Alessandro Del Piero is in India drinking Mango Lassi and collecting Rupees, Emile Heskey is in England doing the pundit thing and Shinji Ono’s is in Japan’s second division the question is wherefore art thou A-League’s Marquees?
There will be pundits on TV and in print rolling out the line “The biggest Marquee in Season 10 of the A League is the number 10” or something like that. The A-League was spoilt the last two seasons with Alessandro Del Piero, Emile Heskey and Shinji Ono
The Top Marquee this A-League season is the number 10. Why would you want a washed up number 10 when their is the Tenth Season of the A-League to celebrate.
Judging by the memberships sales figures the lack of big name Marquees is not affecting the fan numbers. Nice work number 10! It’s taken you ten years but you’ve proved round numbers are very sexy.
David “who needs a pre season?” Villa
Word is David Villa with a hard soft L only arrived a week before the start of A League season because he wanted to see as many Enrique Iglesias concerts as he could. Check out Villa’s Instagram account it’s very true! http://instagram.com/p/tZEYTlPBfW/
Will the World Cup, Euro, La Liga, Champions League winner even bother to play the 10 guest games for Melbourne Heart (Excuse me I forgot it’s Melbourne City now isn’t it) before he heads over to New York to catch up with his superstar mate Frank Lampard?
Or will Villa with the hard soft L love Melbourne so much that he decides to stick around for the whole season?
Probably not. Melbourne City isn’t New York City.
Perhaps if Enrique Englesias does a 28 week tour of Melbourne he’d stay longer. Twenty thousand Euro snobs will be pissed off if he doesn’t play in the opening game of the season against Sydney FC?
Melbourne “Lipstick on a Pig” City
Continuing on with the Melbourne City theme without Damien Duff, Robert Koren and David Villa and a changed home strip and changed name this eerily still feels like Melbourne Heart. Sure it’s ok to change things around with new owners coming in but what will all those Melbourne Westpac workers do now? Only support Melbourne City when they play in their away strips?
Also Robert Koren as the marquee? The richest club in this dimension and the club have chosen a Slovenian Midfielder who used to play for Hull?
Sydney FC
Now that Alessandro Del Piero has left what will all those Euro Snobs do with their summers and their Sydney FC Del Piero named shirts?
I surely thought Sydney FC’s membership numbers would drop due to the Euro Snob factor but they’ve actually increased this season. At the Sydney FC fan day ex Central Coast Mariners coach Graham Arnold said that it was always his dream to coach his home town club of Sydney FC. Nicely said Mr Arnold the Mariners fans must love hearing that.
Are Sydney FC doing a Manchester United and lining up the attack with quality, but not bothering to improve the defence? With Alex Brosque, Shane Smeltz, Marc Janko, Corey Gamiero and Bernie Ibinie, Sydney FC probably have the best attack in the A League. It will be back four that that will be the Sky Blues problem this season.
Brisbane Roar
My new Albanian - Mensur Kurtishi is better than my old Albanian - Bersart Bereshia. That's what Brisbane Roar will be hoping.
The off season was so long I forget that the Roar are the current A-League champions. Is the reason I’m forgetting because of the A-League has world’s biggest offseason in sports? Or just the fact that because of the vast news and information going through our modern brains as each moment occurs we are simultaneously experiencing and forgetting them.
Western Sydney Wanderers
Can they repeat last two season’s success and lose the grand final three seasons in a row?
Can they lose the Asian Champions League Final in between and lose four finals in a row?
Everyone knows the real star of the team is The Red and Black Bloc. Perhaps they should try a new way of supporting their team. Perhaps they could try the reverse of turning your back on your team, and actively watch them from the front of their heads.
And what’s with the silent protesting and the I’m not coming to the game anymore because my mate lit a flare and they banned him for life protest!
Tony Popovic must be an autistic genius at the art of suffocating the opposition and the grinding out a result with Mark Bridge and Labinot Haliti and Brendan Santalab in attack. He could have been Crystal Palace Manager by now instructing Mile Jedinak to break legs and shave off that beard.
Beware Victor Saba your Ned Kelly is numbered!
The "Mutiny” on the Perth Glory
Last season “ The Mutiny” on the Perth Glory “ was led by their captain Jacob Burns, against Lieutenant Alister “Curriculum “ Edwards.
According to accounts, the players were not happy with the "idyllic" life and the opportunities that Lieutenant Edwards afforded to his two sons Cameron and Ryan.
It has also been argued that the Mutineers were motivated by Edwards’s allegedly harsh treatment of them when asked they were asked to play out from the back.
The Mutineers look foolish now as one of the sons Ryan Edwards had amde a decent impact at Reading since he set sail for the Royals in the English Championship.
Newcastle “for sale” Jets
When will the suited and booted folk at Football Federation Australia realise that having billionaires like Nathan “I want to buy the club, no sorry I want to sell the club” Tinkler who use A-League clubs as their playthings is not a good idea?
The Jets haven’t made the finals for years and this year will be just as tough as they have more injuries in their squad than the aftermath of a Friday Night out in Kings Cross and an NRL grand Final.
Adelaide “Mini Me Barcelona” United
So the coach of Adelaide United Josep Gombau was at FC Barcelona for seven years.
The Technical director of Adelaide United former Barca and Spanish International Gillermo Amor after his playing days was responsible for the youth categories at FC Barcelona for four years and most recently he was the director of football training while Messi, Iniesta and Xavi were there.
A slow start to the season led to Gombau being told to harden by a local journalist. The Reds could make a big impact this season they have best technical football knowledge. Will their 3-4-3 make an impact?
Central ”I’m moving to North Sydney maybe” Coast Mariners
One week they are staying on the Central Coast, the next they are moving to North Sydney, another week they can’t pay their players, another week they are opening a 10 million dollar Centre of Excellence, another week goes by and they announce a team of football scouts, the next week, they are being bought by South Melbourne.
It’s never dull up the Coast.
Wellington “does anyone care besides us Wellingtonians?” Phoenix
No Disrespect to the sheep botherers but I’d rather watch a team from Wollongong or Canberra.
Melbourne Victory
For the team that is the biggest club in World Football, it Feels like Melbourne Victory have flown under the radar during this pre-season. Usually the Central Coast Mariners fly under the radar. The Victory took the Bipolar Albanian Besta Berisha from Brisbane Roar so they should be challenging.
Will some Melbourne Victory fans rush to buy memberships because they have mistaken Allesandro Del Piero for Matthieu Delpierre ? Thinking that it’s a typo and the Blue Tongued Maestro is now playing for the Victory?
Who is Del Pierre anyway and what is the Victory's fascination with Marquee defenders Paulo Contreas ?
A League Before of Season Awards
Best Name that almost has a swear word in it: Devante Clut (Brisbane Roar)
Best use of alliteration in a name: Jimmy Jeggo (Melbourne Victory
Best misspelt marquee name: Matthieu Delpierre
Best if it worked with one Albanian let’s try another: Brisbane Roar
The Tom Rogic Groin Injury award: Tom Juric just like the RBB his groin is involved in a rather loud active protest.
The award for best use of useless A-League knowledge: being able to name the Wellington Phoenix squad besides Paul Ifill who doesn’t even play with them anymore. Just joking Phoenix........
Best Hipster Ned Kelly Beard: Victor Saba
Australian Football Podcast A League 2014/15 Season Preview
What do you get when you combine a football writer with a comedy genius?
You probably get the funniest Australian Football Podcast maybe in pod-casting history perhaps!
Featuring the 2014/2015 A League Season Preview. Quirky Music interludes, The Les Murray Football Hotline
Every A-League Team is covered, even Wellington Phoenix! We talk David Villa, Preview the chances of Adelaide United, Brisbane Roar, Central Coast Mariners, Melbourne City, Melbourne Victory, Newcastle Jets, Perth Glory, Wellington Phoenix and the Western Sydney Wanderers.
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Socceroos - Spanish Inquisition (Analysis)
I didn't Expect the Spanish Inquisition
Yes I farken started this piece with a farken Monty Python quote. Fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency and a nice red uniform (make that two farken Monty Pyton quotes) is exactly how the La Farken Furiuos Roja took care of the Socceroos in Curtiba.
Matty Ryan opened his legs and let the Spanish Matador Juan Mata score the third goal plunging his sword into a tiring bull that was the Socceroos campaign as the Aussies ended their World Cup in Brazil with a 3-0 loss without a point and without any real fight left in them.
Matty Ryan opened his legs and let the Spanish Matador Juan Mata score the third goal plunging his sword into a tiring bull that was the Socceroos campaign as the Aussies ended their World Cup in Brazil with a 3-0 loss without a point and without any real fight left in them.
That's two farken Spanish stereotypes in the two opening paragraphs as well as the who what where and how. I might golf clap myself but just like the Socceroos players I'm too cansado (tired).
In the end the Socceroos two chief weapons (still ripping off Monty Pyton I know) suspended Tim Cahil and half injured Mark Bresciano nullified any chance the Socceroos had of getting anything out of the Spain game.
After the Aussies performed well above expectations against Chile and Holland fans worst fears materialised in the last group game. Against the country that loves pronouncing every "C" with a heavy "TH" and every second word with a lisp, it was too much to expect anything but a convincing defeat from the Spanish who were just too classy and skillful.
Even though they beat the Socceroos convincingly Spain were playing in second gear and they are out of the World Cup this early because they kept on playing Heavy Metal (possession based ticki tacka football) when the rest of the world had moved on to listening to Grunge (vertical passing, counter attacking football).
Even though they beat the Socceroos convincingly Spain were playing in second gear and they are out of the World Cup this early because they kept on playing Heavy Metal (possession based ticki tacka football) when the rest of the world had moved on to listening to Grunge (vertical passing, counter attacking football).
At least it wasn't a Pim Verbeek thrashing that happened four years ago in South Africa against Ze Germans, or a Holger Osieck double six nil thrashing. There was no bravery or Anzac type spirit in this performance where the team played above themselves, unfortunately it was what everyone expected.
The Socceroos ended this concert with their worst song, it was a dodgy final third and it's probably my worst music and movie analogy.
You can't blame me though! I hate writing these pieces after the Socceroos lose. I don't know about you but when my team of choice loses I rarely read the match report or opinion pieces . So I don't know why you are even bothering to read this. Are you some sadist who enjoys basking in a loss are you vultures picking at the carcass of defeat?
Hey calm down don't be a Debbie Downer, we got four more years to wait till the next World Cup and the planning starts now! Plus don't forget the Asian Cup in January we expect to win it easily now after how the Socceroos performed in Brazil. Left foot volleys from Tim Cahill here we come! Right?
Hey calm down don't be a Debbie Downer, we got four more years to wait till the next World Cup and the planning starts now! Plus don't forget the Asian Cup in January we expect to win it easily now after how the Socceroos performed in Brazil. Left foot volleys from Tim Cahill here we come! Right?
Positives
- I just got one. We don't have to listen to Craig Foster coach the team from the stands anymore. I liked it when there was some drama in the game and the Socceroos were in the fight but this game the assistant coach commentary was too much.
Random Player Analysis
- Mile Jedinak is so laid back in interviews and press conferences he sometimes gets mistaken for a chair. The Jak was guilty of horrible passing and moments of suspect defending and to top it off he got in the way of a Matt McKay volley against Spain. One of the few Socceroos chances on goal in the whole match. Do you agree with Eamonn Flanngan suggestion that he's the worst Croatian we've ever had?
- Matty Ryan. Alexis Sanchez, Robin Van Persie, Arjen Robben, Fernando Torres, Juan Mata, Nutmegs, Flaps and heading the ball 30 meters out from the Goal-line. Poor Matty Ryan had a World Cup to forget and because he is young and potentially has the skills to pay the bills he hasn't been crucified by the media. Mitch Langerack wasn't afforded so much forgiveness I would have loved to have seen him in action against Spain but it wasn't to be.
Bullshit Stories
- Tim Cahill is leaving New York Red Bulls and sacrificing his salary of three million plus to take a pay cut for two million and get booed while playing for Sydney FC. Just like Sepp Blatter is going to take away the World Cup from Qatar and give it to Australia, it's bullshit farken!
- Mathew Leckie had a great tournament don't get me wrong but he is far from the finished product, and a few dollars short at being valued at 10 million big ones. Besides the chest shot I don't think he had a shot on target the whole World Cup. To paraphrase Paul Keaitng he is all Ice and no Berg.(that doesn't make sense but remember, you're not even supposed to be reading this)
Facts That Aren't Cool Dude
- Brazil 2014 was Australia's worst World Cup performance in the History of the Universe!
- Australia conceded the most goals in their World Cup History!
- The Socceroos didn't get a point in Brazil 2014 making this the worst World Cup in the History of Australian football universe!
- NOT getting to the next round means we still can't call them "Our Socceroos". Unless you get out of the group stage it's still "The Socceroos". Sorry but thems the rules
- Dodgy defence was the Socceroos downfall this time, not dodgy penalty decisions or dodgy send offs or dodgy handballs. They did it to themselves.
- Now that Australia's World Cup Odyssey has come to an end I'm sad. The A-League doesn't start till October. what will I write about now? Make up transfer stories like everyone else? An unnamed source suggest that Mathew Leckie is not moving to Barcelona!
- Dead rubbers at the World Cup suck worse than friendlies.
Cheers for reading my thoughts and grievances over the last couple of months.It doesn't get any better for a football writer than writing about the World Cup. I might write a weekly piece till the end of the World Cup just to keep the writing juices flowing.
Cheers
Con Stamocostas
Cheers
Con Stamocostas
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